Got a very funny email of Dano about life between the cows in Ireland.
Help!!
I suppose I’m quite exuberant for Bantry standards but seeing as I only brought one suitcase with all my favourite clothes, there is not a lot I can do about being stared at wherever I go.
Circumvented by cows,
Residing on a mountain in an extremity of West-Cork I am just so glad I brought three pairs of Ugg’s and a bacon and egg sandwich.
It’s a shame I forgot me knickers but that’s a whole other story.
Waking up to the bovine sounds, should fill me with inspiration for living,
I can only say that 15 glasses of baileys and poteen will make anybody see the necessity for your own ferocity, be that bovine or not!
How or never, I decided to continue my secret journey through my inner self via the rabbit that was asleep next to me but, that again is another story.
To come straight to the point, the person who invented love, obviously male, should be made to carry a baby for the same time as an elephant, then go through 48 hours of labour, and have ‘Jumbo’ taken away for adoption in the circus , Just to experience the pain of love lost.
In fact; the person who invented lovesickness should be shot.
I rest my suitcase on his object. Oops! I mean; I rest my case on this subject
Now, to be serious for a minute, I’ve got my period, and luckily enough two full bottles of wine. Which with some success will be empty rather than full within the next two hours? In case you where wondering or where even interested, (in me for one second please!!) I am not depressed, just throwing a wobbler!
As, in my intellectual opinion, I am quite entitled to, seeing as that I am three weeks into, not having had a manicure, getting addicted to Eastenders (the worse!) having no central heating, no credit cards, no broadband, having a prepaid phone and growing a beard, plus all my other excessive body hair that I won’t even get into detail with you quite at this moment other than to say that I will not take a chance on using my dads old open raiser.
I sent my mum 400 euro for my phone bill the other day but unfortunately I closed the envelope before I put it in. I’m sure she’ll understand.
Today I received my first wages, I only work 52 hours a week so no surprise it wouldn’t even buy me a bottle of wine! But hey I’m not complaining live is good.
But.. for all those who I owe money to, I’m sorry but as you may figure you will have to be just a little patient. i am not having fun I swear!! Really really.
Anybody I don’t owe money to, please raise your hand now and if you would just like to make a donation anyway, please forward your bank details to my email address. It will be taken care off within the next 24 hours. thank you for your time and your money, I mean your patients!
,
the first bottle is gone, I better have a sandwich before I start on the second. Can’t chance turning my first blogg into a disaster!
Anyway, to change the subject;
Seeing as that Lionals (the richie one) is coming over to see me this weekend I wanted to let you all know that I will not be making my return to Amsterdam just yet. I will have to get rid of the straw and buy a proper matras I suppose the Donkey is dancing on the sealing cause he has to sleep outside but hay!! We all have to make are sacrifices.
I will have to put a end to this now as my taxi that I ordered three weeks ago has just arrived, to get me of this mountain for the day. The ride into Neanderthal civilisation will cost me 720 euro but hey! Believe me darlings, it’s worth it. God; it is tough being Irish!
Lovely, lovely people
BeInsirated
love and peace around the world. I miss you all profoundly. Stay tuned! And always remember Nanu Nanu and you can never ever have enough shoes and handbags! You to guys! And hope you doo a decent poo whenever its soots you to do!
Bigg kisses, Danielle
One last thing! My pink umberella was not in Toby’s so who the f stole it!? Hey!?
Always look on the bride side of live tutututututututtuuuu!!
Right I’m going now.. x
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